A little “brainy” humor for your Friday!
What happens when your brain sees a friend across the street?
It gives a brain wave.
Brain waves refer to repetitive patterns of activation of groups of neurons (more like ocean waves with lots of droplets of water together forming a wave than a hand waving). Different types of brain waves are associated with different types of brain activity and the creation of different types of memory.
What continues to work even after it is fired?
A neuron.
A neuron “fires” (or “is fired”) when it sends an electrical impulse. Neurons do this over and over again, so they continue to work even after they are fired.
Why did the brain refuse to take a bath?
It didn’t want to be brainwashed.
Brainwashing refers to the idea that someone can be forced to change their beliefs by various psychological techniques. Trying to brainwash someone does not necessarily require the use of a bathtub.
What do you call a human skull without a hundred billion neurons?
A no-brainer.
There are about a hundred billion neurons in the human brain (estimates have ranged from 80 billion to 150 billion). So if you have an empty skull (no neurons), there is no brain. A no-brainer refers to an easy decision, hence the play on words.
What did the doctor say to the man who had an elephant sitting on his brain?
It looks like you have a lot on your mind.
Without addressing the philosopher’s question whether the mind and brain are the same, having an elephant sitting on it would be a lot.
Why do brain cells grown in a dish attend the ballet and the opera?
Because they are very cultured.
When cells of any kind are grown in outside of a live animal, the process is called being cultured. It really has nothing to do (other than a common word) with Arts that are considered cultured, like ballet and opera. And you can still wear cultured pearls when attending the ballet.
What do you call a Tyrannosaurus under stress?
A nervous Rex.
This is a play on the phrase “nervous wreck” with the “wreck” replaced by “Rex” (Tyrannosaurs Rex). Stress impairs learning, so maybe that’s way dinosaurs are extinct.
What kind of brain images do dogs and cats like best?
PET scans.
PET refers to Positron Emission Tomography. It is a type of brain scan that involves the injection of a radioactive dye to create an image of structures in the brain. While dogs and cats are pets, the truth is that they probably wouldn’t enjoy a PET scan.
What did the hippocampus say during its retirement speech?
Thanks for the memories.
When someone retires from a career, they will often reflect on the many memories they have of their experiences. The hippocampus is a structure in the brain that is involved in memory creation. Ever wondered what creates memories that last? Here’s a key.
What is the brain’s favorite television channel?
The Neural Network.
Neurons connect and are activated in organized collections, called networks. It’s too bad there isn’t really a Neural Network; it might offer more mind-stimulating programming than most of what’s on TV.
What television channel is the favorite of neurons?
The Ion Channel.
Part of the way neurons send signals involves the passing of ions (electrically charged particles) across a membrane. It turns out that Ion is also a real television channel.
Why was the neuron sent to the principal’s office?
It had trouble controlling its impulses.
Neurons communicate via electrical impulses. When the impulses of large groups of neurons in the brain of a student get out of control, then a visit to the principal’s office is, indeed, more likely. When a student ends up in the principal’s office because they couldn’t control their impulses, what they lack is inhibitory control, one of three core executive functions.
When is a synapse like a tree?
When it is pruned.
Synapses are the connections among neurons, the junctions at which they communicate. When the brain eliminates a synapse, because it is no longer needed, it is called pruning, an apt analogy to the removal of a dead branch in tree trimming.
What did the patient say when the neurosurgeon said she needed to remove a mass from his brain?
Well, let me give you a piece of my mind!
This is another play on the idea of the mind and brain being the same. Giving someone a piece of your mind usually refers to telling another person off in anger. This patient might very well have been angry, but in this case, the removal of part of the brain would be physical.
What do neuroscientists call a scan of the brains of a family that can’t get along?
A dysfunctional MRI.
A functional MRI allows scientists to see which parts of the brain are more active than others when someone is performing an activity. There isn’t really such a thing as a dysfunctional MRI, but there are plenty of dysfunctional families.
Kommentare